My 2 Years Annversary!& Still Standing Strong

          Can't believe Ive made it 2 years and I'm still standing strong and keeping my hopes up for whatever challenges I'm going to face everyday that comes through. The past 2 years have changed my life and impacted everything i do or ever did, on December 8th 2011 i got diagnosed with Lupus at age 15 and i had no clue what was really going on, i was so confused and lost. Looking back and remembering everyday i spent at Millers Children's Hospital for what seemed like forever, made me who i am today.  People think once something bad happens and changes everything it breaks you but Not Me, lupus made me stronger and made me want to achieve my goals even more than i ever wanted to. My first year was probably the hardest and it took time for me to recover and get into remission. I went to taking medication every other hour throughout the night and more dosages than you could ever imagine and now i only take 9 pills in the morning and 4 at night now and their only 4 different pills. I remember i would wake up with chest and stomach pains so bad every morning, or having to call 911 because i was having a panic attack and feeling as if i was dying inside . I was so tired of hurting and being in  pain i wanted to just give up but i know i had to stay strong because i knew i couldn't give up on myself and my family. So many people were praying and keeping me stay strong. Its like every day was something new, i never knew what was going to happen, whether i would be laughing or crying, or spending the day at home or in a hospital, everyday i was scared whether i showed it or not. & I'm still scared and i still worry because anything could happen. Being in the hospital for a month wasn't something i planned but i was thankful that i got out on Christmas day and got to spend it with my brothers and sister and my family.  was weak and shaky and couldn't do much but coming home to a warm welcoming i would have to say it was the best Christmas ever.  I Remember waking up one morning and Yelling and feeling as if i gave up, i wanted everyone to stop telling me i was going to be ok because i knew it wasn't going to be,  everything was changing my looks, moods, personality and the way others saw me and just showed pity, i kept telling myself my life was over and i was just a broken wing. all i wanted were answers, so i got on my knees and prayed and asked God, "why me, why did you do this to me" i never got a answer but i look back and know why , i got an answer now and believe it not i thank God now for saving MY LIFE. Lupus saved me in every way possible, yeah it put me through hell in the beginning but my life is healthy and better than its ever been. If it wasn't for Lupus i wouldn't be with my Nana and Papa, i wouldn't have been going to high school with my best friend and i wouldn't be here right now writing to you!God Is my Savor! I know his upcoming year is going to be a year to remember for me! So im going to cherish every moment! and live up to my Fullest!

                                                                                                Love Your Lupus Warrior 
                                                                                                              Stasiia =]

My Strength

 

This Song has helped me through alot, it was dedicated to me and its meaning tells it all!