About Me

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Ontario/Baldwin Park, California, United States

My Everyday Liife

Welcome to a part of my lupie life... its been a journey and i cant say a very easy one. this blog is going to show you anything is possible and even with a chronic illness you can still go out and explore this world. getting diagnosed with lupus isn't something that is planned it just happens and i cant give you a reason on why. i got sick at the age of 15 years old just a freshman in high school with no expectation of going through a life changing experience. i never had a chance to really process or cry the way i wanted when i got sick i had to be strong and react to take care of myself right away. so that's why i have this blog to write my emotions and share my feelings and experiences in the best way i know how and that's writing....i want other lupus warriors to know you aren't in this alone we all are in this together. it took me a couple years to post pictures of me at my worse times when i was swollen from the medications but i'm not ashamed of them because i know when i look back it shows how much i 'accomplished in the last few years. so i here to show you my absolute worse times and my best times. i hope this helps you understand me more and help you warriors as well.

Thursday, October 22, 2015

Changes Last Forever...

So its been forever since I've wrote and my apologies , I've been so busy and things have been a bit crazy where I'm at in my life right now.  its like i have so much running through my mind to tell you but once i write it just doesn't come out the way i want ...i woke up this morning in tears and i didn't know why , so many changes in so little time, i woke up living another lupus day on my own...my rock and best friend has recently left me, my a baby sister.... of course its been hard and i miss her everyday! she has been by my side through it all and I've been by hers since the day she was born. even though she is gone it was time for her to fly...she moved to Tennessee with my mom on may 22nd 2015 and since then a piece of me is gone . i talk to her everyday but its still not the same the first few weeks i cried every day and night and i couldn't sleep with the light off and id still pull her bed out every night and make it as if she was coming to bed. it might of been unhealthy but it was the only way for me to realize night after night she wasn't coming back . i know she is happy and healthy and more alive but its hard to lose a best friend and little sister so suddenly someone you saw as your own daughter ! Diane was the only one who went through every tear, hospital visit, drs appointments and pain with me...on my hardest nights she would stay up with me util she knew i was okie , she wiped my tears and laid with me and told me something silly to make me laugh or put my favorite movie on little mermaid of course ...she knew all the right things all my secrets and my worse and best times, and i know i can never repay her or thank her for everything she has done for me . i love her so much and i know now all i can do is watch her grow from a distance and become that beautiful caring young lady she was for me! She's going to change the world one day and I'm going to support her and when she's in pain ill be the one flying to save her just as she did for me ! siblings are everything in life..they are the ones who understand you like no other ..well at least mine do! i just wanted to tell her thank you and i love you baby girl! no worries I'm going to be okie i promise.... 

                                                        This blog was for me to let go and write what i couldn't say in person ....this was for everyone to know I'm going to be okay ! and that i love my diane with all my heart <3 
            
                                                                                     Love your Stasia!

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